Author: belle

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Yoga in the massage room?

Q: Why are Belle’s healing sessions achieving more results in a MUCH shorter period of time (for people with anxiety, depression, chronic pain, PTSD, sleep issues) as compared to traditional psychology?

A: The answer is simple – Belle uses an integrated bodywork approach for helping people release physical and emotional pain.

Massage as a stand-alone treatment will only get you so far.

The difference between seeing Belle or seeing your psychologist every fortnight is that treatments with Belle actually change the energy system of your body. You don’t “just” talk about things. You actually shift the energy of what you are talking about through your body in a powerful way.
Embodied healing is the only way to truly release the trauma you have been holding. Talking therapy IS important, but it is the FIRST step in a process of recovery.
You won’t have to keep coming for sessions month after month, year after year….because you will actually HEAL and RELEASE the issues you are having. Many of her long time clients only see her twice a year for “top-ups” or to deal with a pressing issue that has arisen. She does not teach you to rely on her, rather she will teach you how to notice how your thought patterns relate to your physical issues (and more importantly what to do about it!)
She will help move the stuck energy thru your body, so the pain can release. A session with Belle will help you understand why you feel how you do, and more importantly how to feel better.

Bodywork + counselling + spiritual healing = FEELING BETTER.

Book an Intuitive Healing Massage today…..

Book Here

No two sessions are ever alike. Here is what some of her clients have to say:

Shannon – “I never know what we will do and I never know how to explain what you do, but I always feel better”


Caine – “I was nervous because I have never seen someone who isnt a psychologist, but I always feel better after an appointment with you”

Keeley – “I just feel lighter and more in my body again”

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When you can’t talk about it

Many women are afraid to speak out about their ex-partner’s verbal or emotional abuse for fear of what they will do. Many times if they catch wind of you talking about their behaviour, they will up their abuse with vicious text rants, email abuse or social media abuse and torments.
It works though – quite often the woman will retreat and hide and suffer alone and in silence.

The whole goal of a person with high narcissism traits is to have control – at all costs. And this includes control of how you think about them, and how you speak about them. If they can silence you, then that is the ultimate control.
When you call them out on their behaviour, it will be vastly different to their own perception. So you may experience verbal reprimands, yelling, gaslighting and re-writing of history.

Signs of verbal abuse

this is taken from mensline.org:

  • Yelling: it’s normal for people in relationships to raise their voice or yell every now and then, but ongoing and repeated yelling is cause for concern
  • Swearing and name calling: belittling your partner by calling them names, swearing at them, or putting them down
  • Demanding or ordering: telling your partner they have to do something and they don’t have a choice
  • Threatening or blackmail: telling your partner there will be consequences if they don’t do what you say – e.g. “If you go out with your friends tonight, don’t bother coming back”
  • “Gaslighting”:  whereby a person is manipulated into questioning their own sanity or perceptions
  • Manipulating: saying things to get someone to do what you want, often through guilt, such as “I did this for you” or “if you loved me you’d do this for me”
  • Patronising your partner: for example saying “You won’t understand, so I’ll explain this again”
  • Blame: always saying it was the person’s fault for “causing” the argument and making you be abusive
  • Passing abuse off as a joke: shaming, insulting, swearing or belittling your partner and then saying “I was only joking” or “You’re too sensitive”
  • Insulting people, or things, that your partner likes, or their religious beliefs
  • Refusing to talk to your partner and blaming them for your silence.

Long term effects of verbal abuse on victims can include low self-esteem, self-doubt, self-harm, and anxiety. Victims may also find it difficult to make decisions and doubt their own ability to communicate.

The end result of verbal and emotional abuse is the disempowerment of the person who is being abused. They will usually retreat, withdraw and give in, because what else can they do? Arguing will end up in them being called the aggressor. Getting angry and defensive will end up in them being told their “too sensitive” or “too aggressive”. Crying will end up in them being told they are “pathetic”. Going to the police will end up in them being told “the police are laughing at you!”

The answer to the madness is to learn how to release your emotional triggers that are always being pushed by the abuser.

Your emotional triggers are sitting right under the surface and are very raw. They have been pushed over and over again, over time, and are very reactive. You will also have trapped many emotions due to your wounded inner child, and also the part of you that believes this is all your fault and you brought it on yourself.
Victim-blaming is very common, which turns into self-loathing and self-hatred. If you are feeling this way, please know that this is just the wounds talking and is NOT TRUE.


You DID NOT cause this, but you CAN STOP THIS cycle from continuing.

What is true about you is that you have some areas to heal relating to resiliency, self-esteem, self love and confidence.
You have some areas to heal around setting boundaries and becoming independent (instead of co-dependent).
You have some areas to heal around internal validation rather than external validation.

Learning to heal after narcissistic abuse is going to be the biggest gift you can give yourself. It will release you from the pattern of putting others before yourself, and for abandoning your own needs. It requires a lot of patience and self-care on your own part to break those limiting beliefs you hold, and to move into better behaviour patterns that support re-empowerment.

I offer 45min Discovery & Empowerment sessions that help people who are beginning to understand narcissistic abuse, to become self-aware and grounded.
This can help you NOT to react to the abuser in your life, and to assert your own needs from a place of clarity.

I will help you come up with a plan to move forward – meeting your own needs and taking your power back.

Discovery & Empowerment
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Trauma Bonding

Let’s talk about empaths and narcissists in an intimate relationship.

It is a recipe for destruction. It can lead to death…literally and figuratively. Every time we hear about a domestic violence case on the news, you can be sure that this escalated over time, and the person who was experiencing the violence would have been in a toxic relationship, with many red flags from the beginning. There would have been many moments when they realised they should have left, however something kept them stuck.
NEVER is it okay to blame the victim, however it is important to understand psychologically what is happening.

Trauma bonding is the term used to describe what happens when a person is involved in a cycle of abuse, devaluation and then positive reinforcement. In a relationship with a person with narcissistic traits, you will experience the cycle of love-bombing/idealisation; devaluation; discard; hoovering (where they try to suck you back in if you try to leave the relationship). The inability of a victim to leave or distance themselves from an abusive partner is part of the cycle of abuse with a person with narcissistic traits.


An empath is defined by the Oxford dictionary as a “science fiction” term and is “a person with the paranormal ability to perceive the mental or emotional state of another individual.” In the spiritual world, people froth their empathic nature, and believe it is part of their “duty” in life, to feel other people’s feelings deeply. They believe it so much like it is their “cross to bear”. (Read more in my blog “Am I an Empath” and learn how to heal this myth.)

An empath is someone who is naturally a care-giver, and very often someone who puts other’s needs before themselves. They might know they do this, or they may not. They may believe that this makes them a good person, and may fear being selfish if they choose to look after themselves first. An empath will often see the good in people, and forgive quickly the bad behaviour – even when they are the victim of bad behaviour. They will make allowances and excuses “he didn’t mean it”, “he does that when he is drunk, but never when he isn’t”, “she is just blowing off steam”. “she treats me well when no-one is around”.

Because you hold an inherent belief that people are good on the inside you refuse to see the other person for who they truly are – only their potential. And that is where you run into trouble. This inability to acknowledge bad behaviour, (or worse – you internalise it and make it about you needing to do more or be more), can be extremely self-destructive to an empath. When you are in a narcissistic relationship, or at least a toxic one, you will notice that the person’s words NEVER match their actions. Let this be your #1 RED FLAG.
(From a spiritual perspective all people are made from the source, however this doesn’t make them necessarily “good for you”.)

You may make the decision to leave, and start making plans, and even find support from friends and family or professionals. But you get pulled back in by the nice gestures, the grand gestures, the apologies, the promises to change. And things may be good for a while. A week or a month. But sure enough the behaviour goes back to how it always was – and oftentimes it gets worse. Much worse. Because now you know you should have left before, but you chickened out and couldn’t go through with it, because he/she/they “said they would change and it would be better”.
Sound familiar?
It never changes for long. It always reverts to how it was. And it hurts even more and the trauma bond increases. The periods of positive reinforcement become fewer and further between the abuse periods

Trauma bonding is a very powerful force that can make friends and family really frustrated with you, and make you frustrated with yourself. So let’s just acknowledge that for a moment. And it is OK if those around you are frustrated. (and if you are frustrated with yourself!)
So let’s use this energy and transmute it into action!

You know that you know that your know that this relationship is toxic.
And you also know that is is REALLY SCARY to contemplate change.
All good.
It IS scary.
But you know what is more scary? Seeing how deep the damage can go – to your physical body, you emotional body, your mental body and your spiritual body. (There are many people staying in relationships long past their due date who have chronic fatigue, fibromyalgia, mental health issues and contemplating suicide.)

STEPS TO TAKE:

So the starting place is to acknowledge what is.

The second step is to seek support from a professional who is experienced in working with people who are experiencing narcissistic abuse, and

And then naturally the third step is that you leave properly this time. For good. And you don’t go back for a second round or a third. (However this is REALLY difficult if you haven’t done any healing work on yourself before hand. I would even go so far as to say it is virtually impossible to leave without healing and counselling.)

Unless you have strong boundaries and have healed…(which can take a while) you will NOT be able to make a plan to leave and LEAVE FOR GOOD. So begin to heal BEFORE you leave and then you will feel strong and grounded for the road ahead.

Belle

Getting help from a professional who can help you identify the trauma bond, and identify the areas of trapped emotions you hold is the natural first step for anyone who is considering leaving a toxic relationship. The trauma bond is REAL, and the pattern keeps repeating itself over and over until you have healed enough that you can remove yourself.

Gift yourself this time and space so you can identify WHY you are in this relationship and HOW you can be released from the trauma bond.

Belle is an experienced counsellor and spiritual healer who will work with you to release your triggers and emotions that are trapped so you can feel stronger and more empowered.
Book your online or in-person session now

Book Here
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Healing after Narcissistic Abuse

As someone who has lived in a narc abuse situation and felt the immense pain of losing self-confidence, zest for life, grounding, sense of reality as far as what I knew I was seeing and feeling, but being told I wasn’t……it is dangerous and very damaging.

However, I hold no anger towards them anymore (oh yes, I went thru ALL the stages of grief, including anger, but I have moved thru to the lesson now)…

In order to heal and move forward, I had to go “no contact” and never go back. It was VERY painful. I felt like I had lost my life. My future. My happiness. But I HAD TO in order to gain my life and future and happiness again.

How did I heal? Thru working on the darkness – the Shadows – that were rising up in me. By choosing better mind habits and physical habits that supported healing and growth.

MANY people cycle in their narc relationship by GOING BACK, again and again – they keep HOPING it will change. But it doesn’t. It is very consistent. It feels like it gets worse every time – but it doesn’t, it is just that each time you GO BACK you have a renewed sense of hope that gets dashed…and it is THIS that hurts more and more.

They never change. Their insecure and fragile ego is the same – insecure and fragile.

BUT YOU CAN CHANGE...and you can take your power back and stop giving it away. You can CHOOSE to heal. And CHOOSE to make the heartbreaking choice to END THE MADNESS.

Your life depends on it. Truly it does. And unless you see the pattern and recognise your role in it, you will keep cycling. Feeling worse and worse each time. Until you have nothing left.

Don’t let yourself get to this place of utter brokenness – don’t allow yourself to get to this point.

EVERYONE can heal from this kind of relationship – you have to face your Victim part of self in the Shadows, and recognise the values and beliefs you are holding that have put you in this position. It comes down to personal responsibility and an acceptance of what is. The situation WILL NOT change AT ALL unless YOU begin to heal and make changes. And you need to do this REGARDLESS of whether the other person changes and does the work or not.

Their healing is NONE of your business. To think otherwise it is a form of co-dependence – and you need to address this too.

IF you are wanting to break the cycle, stop repeating the same patterns then get in touch. I can help you to heal and grow and get to know yourself again – on your terms!
I can help you access those parts of you in your Shadow, and release the energy strands of past lives and karma that is holding you in this pattern.

Get in touch,
Belle

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Pain can be your best friend

….however it may not feel like a good friend at first. In this blog I share my own healing journey from how I became an Emotion Code healer to now – facing my own healing crisis again with a hand injury.

And so the time has come for the healer to heal herself….well, to be honest, she has been doing that for a while now. It is a never ending process that as an awakening woman I have long been familiar with.

I noticed pain in my base of thumb for a few years now, but it started to get worse during the last semester of uni. I was writing more notes, and massaging more clients than I have in a while and it really took its toll on my hand.

The simple solution is: stop doing massage and stop writing notes.
Okay.
So how do I put food on the table and provide for my kids and how do I study? Simply put I dont want my life to change in any way shape or form because the uncertainty is scary and so I pretend I dont notice the pain on a deeper level, and just manage the symptoms.
I press on with ice packs and essential oils and hand splints, and push thru the pain, and massage in different ways, hoping it will just go back to normal.
But you and I both know this isnt a long term, wellbeing solution. And I am afraid of the outcome if I dont do anything about it, but not afraid enough to change anything.

What helps people feel better in the long term?
Change of lifestyle, change of habits, change of thought patterns, and change of energy field.

I share this with you, because even for me – a woman who KNOWS the mind body connection, and KNOWS the language of her body, I STILL RESIST the messages at times – particularly the messages that address some core wounding and fears.
And this is what many people are facing that I see in my clinic. this is the BIG stuff, the stuff that requires courage to face, and it can be terrifying.
Until the pain or discomfort gets bigger than the FEAR that stops you from facing it.

I became an energy healer back in 2014 after struggling with a really sore right shoulder for about six months. The pain got to the point where I couldn’t drive without pain, cos I couldn’t get my arm in a position that felt good.
I did yoga and lifted weights, was super fit, I never rested, I worked hard and was a newly single mum with 3 kids. To say I was “shouldering” a burden of responsibility was an understatement. I was worried about paying bills, worried would I ever meet the man of my dreams, worried I was failing as a mum and worried I was a massive failure in general.
I tried physio which didnt do anything – didn’t make it worse or better. And believe me, my physio is excellent at his craft. His treatments did nothing because it wasn’t a physical injury. It was energetic. I just didn’t know it at the time.

After a few months of physio treatment going nowhere I was starting to be concerned that my life as a massage therapist was going to come to an end, and I was terrified that I had no other skills. I mean, I am a bodyworker – what else could I do?
And then I stumbled across an energy healer who did Emotion Code. It was a non-touch therapy that worked on the emotional layers that were trapped or stuck in my energy field. WHOAH. what?
I honestly didn’t believe it at first. I thought it was a joke.
But after FIFTEEN MINUTES I could move my shoulder again without pain. I was floating, I felt amazing. And I couldn’t believe it.

However it was short lived. The pain came back 2 days later.
So I called this woman who I now declared a charlatan and she said “okay let’s do a full session, I’ll call you back at 2pm”
And after that session I have NEVER had shoulder pain again.
Fixed.
Completely.

And that’s when I decided to learn Emotion Code myself so I can take care of others in the same way.

Isn’t that incredible! I had opened the door to a new world thru the pain in my shoulder. I began to walk down a path I never knew existed because of the pain in my shoulder caused by the feelings of fear and worry and burden. I had taken those though patterns and walked thru a door into a new world and way of showing up in my practice.
I am forever grateful for that.

And now as the pain in my hand brings me to a slow down again, I am reminded not to be afraid, but to dive deeper into the healing space, releasing the trapped emotions (which will in turn release the fears around “grasping” my life with two hands even in the face of uncertainty) and being open to receiving the new blessings and new pathways that will come up as a result of having to slow down (or maybe even stop, not sure yet) massaging people.

This is the gift of energy healing. We don’t focus on the actual physical problem. We focus on the underlying causes that can only be accessed once the emotional layers are released – and then the story can be told.

Our physical body is simply a manifestation of the thoughts, words, judgements and beliefs we hold.
We feel pain and discomfort because these thoughts are not in alignment with our wise woman / wise man.
And it is this misalingment that is trapping the emotions which then cause “issues in the tissues”.

The process of releasing is simple. However the process of getting you to make and appointment, to show up and to have enough courage to face the deeper layers is what keeps people in resistance.
Simply take the first step, and I will guide and support you to do the rest.
Make a decision to get to the bottom of the pain and discomfort and watch your life come alive as you step closer into alignment with who you truly are.

Emotion Code appointments are part of my Health & Wellness consultations. Initial sessions are 2hrs, as I take a detailed history to ensure I have a complete picture of what is going on for you. In a session you will relax deeply – maybe even fall asleep at times – and you will learn a lot about yourself (or maybe just “remember”!)

Appointments can be made here, and can be in clinic or via Zoom: Bookings

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Soul Care: calling yourself home

If you are out of alignment, struggling with self care, unsure of your purpose, feel uncomfortable in your own skin, then this blog may help you….

When it comes to Soul Care, I am uncovering more about what this actually means with each day that I breathe. Soul care is the act of conscious listening to the inner sanctuary and conscious alignment with source.

Soul care to me, also means that I am in touch with all the aspects of myself that I have – even the ones I don’t want to admit to having. The ones that I reject of myself on a daily basis, and even the ones that I suppress and pretend arent’ there. And there are a lot of aspects that I pretend aren’t there, or would be happier knowing they weren’t there!

I didn’t know how far I had travelled away from myself, and how long and arduous the journey home would become until I began. And I didn’t even mean to begin. It happened organically and when I was in perfect timing to receive the messages and guidance that is always available and waiting for me to pick up on.

The path to a spiritual life is always an adventure, and I have always been a seeker of spiritual things, of truth, of divine learnings. I remember from the first book I read – “The Celestine Prophecy” and the learning of energy and how you can “see” it….to the many nights with a bottle of wine and some introspective friends sitting by a fire side, debating the meaning of all that is.
But…..
How did I get on this path of Soul Care though?

Quite by accident really – although is there ever an accident or coincidence in the universal realm (I no think so!)
I didn’t know that six years ago as I began using essential oils for my clinic clients, that I would be journeying home to self. I had a doTERRA rep come to see me – to “sell” me oils, and cos I thought she was so lovely I chose to get some pretty cool looking oils to stand on my clinic shelf lookin’ all sexy and alluring, with the hope that I might boost some more sales. (forgive me, I wanted to increase profit, not Soul Care!)

But when I first smelled the Serenity blend she wafted under my nose I thought “I must have this”. I began to use it on a LOT of clients, who also purred when they smelled it and declared “Give me some!” And as I used it on them, I was also using it on myself, aligning myself and healing myself at the same time (and still I didn’t know it).

However I LOATHED the smell of pure Lavender on its own. It stunk so bad to me, “get away from me oh ye filthy oil of excrement”! I declared.
Same for Geranium! Oh poo. But I would use Geranium for many clients as it is so wonderful for our feminine cycle and is a feature in birthing blends that I create.
But one oil that I would diffuse in the clinic and at home, and wear as a perfume was Bergamot – that delicious citrusy, earl grey tea flavouring – well…give me all of it!!!!

So it would be fair to say I had a love-hate relationship with some of the oils. It was polarised for me – either I LOVED or DESPISED their aroma.

As I learned more about emotional healing thru my energy work and as I learned more about oils and their effect on emotions I came to understand that the oils I was oppositional to, were the ones my body was out of alignment with.

You see, from my perspective, why on earth would you have a repulsion so strongly to an aroma that comes from a plant?

Plants have incredible healing properties, some are known and some are unknown to us. They are multicellular and have thousand times more chromosomes than what we have as humans (46 humans compared to 1260 in a fern!!!) Being complex structures they have incredible magick housed inside their green stems and colourful flowers that medicine women have known since the beginning of time. As a woman who is coming back to self, I was tapping into this wise magick that is in the blood lines of every woman on this earth, as she gently weaves herself back to harmony with herself.

Lavender was teaching me how to re-connect with my inner wise woman, to release the energy strands of self loathing and hatred, of cutting myself off from infinite supply. Lavender was helping me to resurrect my ability to communicate with the essence of my true nature, by delicately and gently helping me to love that aspect of myself again. However it was disguised to me in the Serenity blend – which has a base of lavender with sandalwood – which I used to help me relax, sleep or meditate.
Using this oil I was able to tap into the tools of meditation and spiritual practices that help me to achieve deeper clarity of who I am, and I activate the desire within me to surrender into stillness so my consciousness can expand.
And slowly over time the aroma of lavender didn’t seem so repugnant, in fact I reach for this oil often these days as I have resolved the aspects of myself that weren’t in alignment….or more precisely I have called these parts home to myself.

Geranium was teaching me to love myself and to trust in myself again. Over the years of my life I had experienced heartbreak and trauma – like most people have. I had been hurt by others and had put up walls to protect myself. I had lost the ability to trust in the words of others, but to notice their actions above all else. I had gathered a cynical perspective and had blocked myself from heart centred communication when I felt triggered to protect myself. I didn’t use Geranium oil for my own use at all, it was merely in clinic, so the work this oil did for me was slowly and a lot more gentle. She taught me to trust and forgive and to remain tolerant and open even when I was scared and suspicious. She taught me to sit in the heart space and to allow her to open to receive the love that is always ever present from divine presence. She has taught me how to gently explore the idea of unconditional love and trust of self (this is a work in progress).

Bergamot was always my favourite oil, to soothe a woman that is rooted in relieving feelings of despair and low self esteem. And I can see this oil in action in my life. Even though I had been deeply hurt, and I carried scars from years ago, I still got up, faced the world, put on a brave face (a mask!) and kept on going. Thriving despite adversity, but still feeling the effects of the life I had created for myself that hid in the layers of my heart.
The things about soul work though, is that eventually you need to take the mask off and sit face to face with truth. The truth was I was hating myself, judging myself and feeling truly unlovable at the deepest layers of myself. My mask was slipping and I was finally – with the aid of lavender and geranium able to admit this truth to myself. Bergamot facilitates a process of self acceptance and learning to become hopeful again.

And then I was able to break. Thru. Within. To come home.

And when you break, you start to shatter all the pretends and the projections and the un-truths and simply sit with self. It was frightening but also comforting. To finally stop and to just be.

Bergamot helps me to love myself again, to know that I am lovable and worthy and “good enough”. So I say “no” a lot now. I change my mind. I think twice. I stay home. I go out. I take days off (on purpose!) I schedule my cycle and don’t work on the Monday of that week so I can drink tea in the sunshine or rainy weather, and I can stay in my pj’s and read or watch crappy tv and just be alone in the house when the kids are at school. I allow myself to soak up nothingness and replace busy with ease.

Without my oils in my tool kit I would have found another way – the soul always knows how to get your attention. This is how my soul paved the way for my awakening and my growth.

It didn’t make it easier, it didn’t make it quicker.
The oils gave me something to lean on in my darkest times and something to celebrate with when it was a good day. They fostered my ability to unconsciously listen to myself, so it became second nature to self care – which is all the soul is really asking you to do.

IF you feel like this is resonating and would like to try the power of essential oils for your own spiritual needs, get in touch with me and we can talk about how they can help you – with your mask and journeying home to self.

Belle xx

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Who cares what “they” think!

“It’s none of my business what other people think of me” ….said the healing empath.

Have you ever felt like you’re not being your true self because you’re afraid of what others might think?
There is so often this invisible brigade of haters that sit in the background of your life that get to comment on every little thing about you.
It could be in little ways every day that you are sitting under this weighted blanket of having to appease the masses.
And it is soul destroying because you never get to fully expand into your true self.
This manifests in many ways such as lacking in self esteem, wont put your hand up for a promotion, feeling left out a lot, not feeling satisfied in your life, lacking purpose of direction.

Or it could be that you wake up one morning and realise you are in the wrong job, relationship, planet ?

We get caught in this cycle of trying to make others happy that we forget how to make ourselves happy. This king of thinking creeps in and many of us dont even know it is happening. We stay quiet so we dont hear crticism.

We dont go for that new network marketing job cos we know our friends and family are going to scoff and say it is ridiculous – be you KNOW the thought of it lights you up!

We stay in this place of being the good girl long into adulthood, cos we still want our parents to be proud of us – and this comes at the expense of our true happiness.

So if you feel that you aren’t speaking your aligned truth or you aren’t even privately allowing yourself to think in alignment with your truth, it is time to ask who’s truth you’re in?

Society?
Community?
Family?


In order to live a full life you MUST come into alignment and truth of who you actually are. Without rejecting your quirks or loudness or quietness or “too much-ness” or “not enough-ness” .It is time to love allllllll the part of yourself that make you YOU. Anything less is cutting off parts of yourself.
So if you want to DREAM….do it
If you want to SCREAM…do it
Let the frustration out, the smallness, the shutting down, the rejecting self, the ignoring the rising excitement, the keeping the status quo, the biting your tongue, the “making do”, the settling…..let it all out.

And step into YOU

If you need help with this, and know you have blocks, but feel afraid, then lets do some healing work around this.
Book a Health and Wellness session with me and lets start getting YOU back.

Belle xx

Book Here

(online and in-person sessions are available)

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Is it time to heal?

Trauma doesn’t have to be some dark awful experience
It can be multiple times of not listening to instinct. Not hearing your inner wisdom.

  • Of ignoring what’s best for you.
  • Of not being listened to by care givers.
  • Of being told you’re being silly.
  • Or too emotional.
  • Or to stop crying.
  • Or to man up.
  • Or stop crying like a girl baby.
  • Or chin up and rise above it.

When we are conditioned to ignore our own feelings we shut down the inner child. We tell her/him that they’re not important. That their feelings are redundant. That they don’t matter.
That is also trauma.
This changes a person.
So as an adult you continue not listening or caring or responding or tending to the inner child’s needs.
Until you can’t ignore it anymore.
Because challenges and crisis emerge. Because cycles repeat. Because the ‘come to Jesus’ moment happens and you find yourself stripped bare on the floor crying your tears of unreleased pain.
And then you cradle your inner child. You hold them til the tears subside. You caress their cheek and tell them they Are safe to be who they are.
And you heal…..

Do you recognise these signs:

Have you found yourself speaking or acting in ways you don’t feel are even “you”?
Have you found yourself becoming resentful of all the things you do for people, for seemingly no thanks?
What about when people speak to you have you noticed that it just isn’t nice and makes you uncomfortable?

Feel taken for granted a lot?

This is a sign it is time to heal your inner child. She/he can be quiet for a really long time, and then what feels like “suddenly” start playing up and acting out. And it can be scary to take a look at yourself.

What does healing the inner child look like?

Well, it is different for most people, so I will share what it feels like instead of how it looks…..it feels like coming back to loving yourself. It feels like home. It feels solid and safe and secure. It feels clear. It feels right.

IF you would like to feel like this, then book a Health and Wellness session with me – in person or online. And together we can explore this beautiful world of inner child work so you can feel more like your old self.

Belle xx

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The Awakening Woman


My Mission: to support other women as they awaken to their true nature and inherent power. Now it is my honour and privilege to work with other women who are feeling the call of their wise woman. Who no longer want to live a life unfulfilled, with resentment and frustration.

Oh hey there Wise Woman,
Thank you for stopping by for a moment.

Being a Wise Woman is a way of life. It is also a source of light that will empower and encourage other women to come out from hiding, to stand in their divine feminine power and to rise as the woman they were created to be. Free download: I have created a simple to follow workbook called “Core Values” that will help you to get very clear on what is important to you in your current season. I know this will help you to develop your ability to listen to your wise woman (your inner wisdom) and live your life from a greater place of alignment and clarity.

You can download it here: https://belle-flowers.mykajabi.com/pl/78624

My Story:
I spent a great many years living from a place where I thought I “should be”. I placed waaaayyy too much importance on what other people “might” say, or what other people “might” think about me. And this caused so much sadness, disappointment and frustration inside of me. When I finally realised the cause of my frustration was that I wasn’t living according to my core values, but to those around me (family, friends, colleagues, employer), I was able to take back control.
As soon as my true values became clear to me, I was able to begin the work of listening to my inner wisdom – this is what I call the Wise Woman. She spoke gently to me, was encouraging and not at all forceful. Because she is the higher self and the source of connection to divine.
I was able to let go of the limiting beliefs I was holding around who I am, and how I show up in the world. I was able to explore finding my confidence and personal power.


As a a woman who is awakening too, I know you already have felt the push-pull inside of you, that part that questions the status quo, and wonders if they were created for something more? (The answer is yes you are!)
Many women these days are returning to their soul, for healing and for truth, to answer the ultimate questions… “am I good enough?”, “am I worthy?” and “am I lovable?”

The truth is you are – YOU ARE.
Let me guide you to realising this for yourself,

Belle xox

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How to use your emotions to feel incredibly good

How would you rate your Emotional Wellness on a scale of 1-10?

 

8-10 – my emotions are fairly balanced and even. Sure I am like most women and will feel irritated at times, but I am reliable and stable and think clearly and reasonably most of the time.
5-7 – I tend to go up and down,mostly even, but I can usually bring myself back to normal after a while (food / wine helps). I am more happy than sad, hardly get angry (although sometimes the kids push me to the verge of being a T-Rex), but I think I’m not as bad as others I hear about. I would say I am pretty much middle of the road, and whilst life is okay, I have everything I want, there are still times when I get sad for no reason or get snippy at people. 
3-4 – I am quite up and down most of the time and I get anxious / moody / depressed at periods of time for sure. I drink probably more than I should. I don’t exercise much and I really feel like life is difficult. I definitely eat more than I would like, and it is probably “emotional eating”. I feel sad a lot. And I sometimes wonder why life is so hard. 
1-2 – I can’t handle my emotions going up and down all the time – actually I wish they would go up so I can feel good and confident and excited about life! I have been on anti-depressants for a really long time, I don’t trust myself off them. I have a lot of anxiety and have a psych that I see a lot – this is my saving grace. 

 

It’s true, you may feel overwhelmed by the strength of your emotions at times, but the fact is this society we live in is trying to make you fit a mold of being “even and level”…however a vibrant woman is like a flowing river. Sometimes meandering, sometimes rushing, sometimes there are rapids, and sometimes quiet pools of reflection. Learning to listen to your energy body – both physical and emotional – will help you to break the cycle of the ups and down, and give you a way forward when you are feeling hopeless. 

Learning to listen to and respond to your Physical & Emotional Body

Are you getting a sore neck and shoulders more often than not? Do you have questionable tummy issues? Do you get tension headaches and feel stressed and on edge a lot? Heart Palpitations that are not a “heart problem”?

These are all signs of emotional imbalance…and if left unchecked, will only get worse.

Emotional Wellness & Intelligence means you are aware of your emotions, know what they mean, know what physical symptoms are related to, know why they are there, and how to use them – and you NEVER try to squash them down.
Instead, you tame them and make them work for you.

Your body is a biofeedback system that tells you when something isn’t quite right – so physical symptoms are the window to your emotional body. Learning how to use your physical sensations to gauge your emotional health and achieve mastery over them is a practice, and is an unfolding. It doesn’t happen overnight, and usually it comes after a period of feeling flat, uninspired and lacking zest for life.
When you are in this season it can feel frightening and like you will never return to a life of balance and pleasure and excitement…but be assured, you are standing at the precipice of blossoming, if only you will have the courage to keep moving through…..

Emotions can be affected by:

* food (some foods really affect you in the brain first, and the body later – so you may not even realise what you are eating is directly responsible for your mood.)
* dehydration (most people are chronically dehydrated, increasing your water intake to 2L-3L per day will have an immediate impact – try it!) 
* lack of exercise / or too much (hard core exercise in a stressed-out person is counter productive, and can make your stress levels much worse. If you are a couch potato, then you already know this is no good. Get up. Gently walk around the block…and listen to Tony Robbins – you need to move your ass!)
* hormonal imbalance (which can be thrown out by stress, its a vicious cycle, so get your food and water and exercise on track and watch your cycles…if you aren’t regular with a 4-5 day bleed each month, then see a naturopath, or try doTERRA’s Phytoestrogen supplement. It is a god-send for me.)
* too much stress (and not enough tools to help eradicate it.) Self-help is everywhere. Try a yoga class (yin, not Vinyasa/Power) attend a meditation class, use calming essential oils like doTERRA’s Lavender Peace/Serenity or Peace blends.)
* your environment (empaths know what this means!) The people around you can greatly impact your emotions. Spend time with people who make you feel happy and balanced. Stay away from the drainers, and the ones who are bitchy or who bitch about other people to you.
* physical connection (sensual / non sexual touch works wonders for mood.) Holding hands, cuddling with partner or kids, or having a cuddle with your dog/cat is a great way to increase feel good hormones in your brain/body.Ask your partner for a sensual breast massage using doTERRA’s Whisper blend. And tell him “no sex, just touching” – he will be beside himself! 
* chemicals (drugs, perfumes, skin care, cleaning products). Ever had a cleaning headache from the bathroom cleaners you use? Have you noticed it can instantly it affect your mood, giving you a crappy headache and making you sleepy. The same is true for many perfumes – these are a chemical cocktail of toxins that are just waiting to get into your airways and flood your body thru the blood. They have a HUGE impact on the body. Steer clear and using a Pure-Fume like doTerra’s Whisper blend, or Patchouli or Wild Orange.
* Music (radio, news, podcasts, training vids on You Tube) Listening to people whinging about love-lost is not going to inspire a happy mood. So crank up Bon Jovi and rock that mood out. Or maybe Beyonce is more your thing. And get rid of those talk-back radio stations that are filthy or low-brow and encourage stupidity! Also cut back on the violent and salacious tv shows you insist on binge watching. The same goes for reality “fight-fest” tv. What you watch and listen to will affect your mood, and affect your energy field, and you may not even notice it until it is too late.
* memory – I dare you to open a photo album and walk down memory lane and look at your history. See where you came from, re-live the good times. Do this with your kids. Or play the game “remember when ….?” Kids love to be reminded about fun times together, so do this often. 

The key is to listen with attention to your body and to learn how to nourish and care for her.

Emotions as Guideposts:

Knowing how to use your emotions as guideposts is the sign you are turning into your Wise Woman. She is that part of you that is patient, kind, loving and caring to Self. She isn’t afraid to feel, or express, but she knows why she feels the way she does, and can manage her moods and her ups and down with grace and care. 

Allowing the Wise Woman to come forth:

How long has it been since you sat in stillness and listened to your inner wisdom? Your Wise Woman is that part of yourself. She is gentle, so her wisdom isn’t like a punch in the gut – it is that instinctive “knowing”. Like when you have a newborn bub and she is crying her heart out, and you just know how to soothe her and what she likes.
Or when you have a major life decision to make, and your head wants to keep telling you which way to go, but your “gut” says something else….and you go with the head, knowing full well you should have gone with your gut. That is her. She is your Wise Woman.

The best way to re-introduce yourself to her is to begin a daily ritual of saying “thank you for being here” and acknowledging her in your life. When you ignore your gut instinct, you are essentially ignoring a part of yourself.

Take notice of when you suddenly get a sore tummy out of no-where – what is it trying to tell you?
Notice when you finish a massive day at work and your body is aching everywhere – what is it trying to tell you?
Notice when you feel frustration rising up inside of you – what is it trying to tell you?
Notice when you totally lose your shit at the kids/dog/partner – what is it trying to tell you?

You already know the answer, but you still don’t do anything to change your circumstance. The Wise Woman starts to arise when you begin to “know” and she is in full force when you start to make changes due to the knowing.

Your emotional guidance system was created FOR YOU, not to be AGAINST YOU. So allow the feelings and sensations to rise up – take notice, and ask the question “what do I need?”
And let your Wise Woman guide you.