Year: 2017

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Hubby Hopeless at massage? Honey, leave it to the professionals!

You don’t need a hubby to massage you:
Honey, you need a perinatal specialist!

 

Many women say to me “I told my partner to massage me, but he’s hopeless!” (And thank god he is – otherwise we would be out of a job!)
However, the beauty of seeing an experienced perinatal massage therapist is that we know there is more work to be done here than just massaging the sore spots.
You are only going to get frustrated with your man cos he can’t get the right spot – but honestly, why do you expect him to hold the knowledge of 20yrs of experience in the thumbs of his left and right hand. Unless he is spiritually gifted with the knowledge of a previous life, then you can be damn sure he is trying his best, but when he knows he can’t do it right because he works at a desk job and has no idea what to do with his hands and basically is scared of the T-Rex that might emerge when he is “doing it wrong”.

Your massage therapist is more than just a good pair of hands-  she is strong shoulders to
lean on, and a big heart to be nurtured from – use her.
She is waiting for you.

No Love, leave it to the professionals. We are the ones who can work with your body and support you every step of the way. Knowing how to position a pregnant body is one thing, but understanding why you are feeling the way you do (ie: why are the aches and pains there in the first place) and then knowing how to release them physically or emotionally is another thing altogether.

This is the reason a professional is required in pregnancy:

Let me speak a moment about using firm pressure in a massage during pregnancy. This is really my domain here. I believe that there is a huge opportunity here for the woman to learn how to breathe deeply whilst under pressure (if you have had a deep tissue massage before you will know what this is like!) I will teach you how to breathe in a way that transmutes the pain and helps it to ease away. I will teach you to not fear “pain” but to be able to recognise that the sensation of pain has many levels and that not all will actually be tremendously uncomfortable. The Good Pain. Do you know what I mean?

I choose to call it a sensation rather than pain, and often I will say that this is just a challenge point which means you can breathe through it. This kind of sensation awareness is invaluable for when you are in labour, because you will have already set up a pain/response cycle that involves deep breathing, and switching of the fear/retreat/panic response (which only causes more intensity of pain) and allows you to relax into the sensations.
We don’t push you though trigger points and follow the “no pain no gain” principle. Nor do we think a “fluffy” light-handed massage is going to do anything other than annoy the woman on the table. Let’s face it, when a therapist is moving their hands over that sore spot over and over again but …they…just….don’t…get…..into…it…OMG it is SOOOO frustrating. Right?

We sit somewhere in the middle of these two principles. We know the aches and pains and we know how to work with them – just firmly enough – to enable them to release. But if you have ever been to a Spa or a clinic that doesn’t specialise in pregnancy massage, you will be very familiar with their ”softly, softly” approach. But, maybe this is just what you need? So, we know how to adjust our pressure accordingly, it is never a one size fits all­ approach in our treatment rooms.

You can’t learn most of the stuff we do here at the clinic in a TAFE or a college. The work we do is based on research, theoretical questioning and then observations, testing and revising. That’s our point of difference. We have applied the training we have done, directly to our pregnant clients, and we see amazing results because we treat the whole person – mind, body and spirit.
Not only that, we will show you how to turn over in bed that will reduce discomfort, and we will show you how to use meditation and essential oils to ease symptoms and issues that crop up in each trimester.  

You are not losing your mind:

Sometimes during pregnancy you will feel like there will be a different emotional state seemingly every few hours! But don’t be alarmed, you are simply transitioning and learning how to be in a new role.

For now, you are the grower of a child, and this will challenge even the most stable woman. Learning how to process these strong emotions that come out of nowhere will also help you to release them so they don’t return as often, or at all.

 
Learning how to lean in to your massage therapist during these trimesters can be empowering and incredibly reassuring as you transition to motherhood. Hopefully your massage therapist has had a baby or three and can understand exactly where you are at, and empathise with you! It helps to know you aren’t going mad, and that your tears – as irrational as they may be – are perfectly acceptable in this moment.

 

Belle xx

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Emotional Pain from IVF leads to physical pain

The world of IVF and assisted pregnancies leads to women needing a different kind of support from her natural health practitioner during this season of uncertainty.
For a woman travelling the road of questionable fertility it can be scary, anger inducing, devastating, and sucks the joy out of life (and sex to be honest.). To be micro-managed in the intimate layers of your life is humiliating, humbling and weirdly comforting all at different times. Having to ask for help is a hard pill to swallow and this alone can be the obstacle hardest to overcome.

Physical pain is usually the reason a woman will ask me to treat her in the early stages of pregnancy following a round of IVF, or after a miscarriage.

Low back pain, and upper back pain are usually the first two places that need assistance. Pain is known to steal the joy out of anyone’s life, but it can be even more acute and devastating for a woman who has previously miscarried. The first sign of pain may send fear signals all over her already stressed body. Pain will take a pregnant woman to the depths of despair as she is largely unable to control the outcome of her pregnancy. 

You might think the pain might be just physical in nature, however usually there are layers and layers of trapped emotions causing disruption to the lumbar area and to the neck and shoulders. 

So what are trapped emotions and why are they not spoken of more? Trapped emotions are simply the energy of emotions you have felt, perhaps long ago, or in more recent times that have become stuck in the physical tissues of the body. If you think about it, the feeling of being sad is a little different to feeling of grief..right? And feeling depressed is very different to the feeling of anger. Emotions are just energy and they all feel slightly different. Day to day you no doubt feel hundreds of different emotions in different circumstances. Most of the time the emotions rises up and then is released back into the mystery of where it came from. But sometimes it gets stuck…and this is when it starts to create havoc in the tissues of the body.

You may have heard of “muscle memory” – that mystical way a muscle will “remember” how to perform an action after a period of inaction. For instance, if you start a muscle building program again after a holiday, you will more quickly get back to where you were. 
Trapped Emotions are literally the “emotion memory” that hasn’t been fully released. And so you are more likely to get triggered over and over if you hold a trapped emotion. Have you ever lost it with rage to think “where on earth did that come from”? That is emotion memory that has been triggered. Have you ever felt like it was ground hog day with the same thing happening over and over again over a period of time? Or have you felt like everywhere you go you get ignored or jostled or pushed? This could be due to a trapped emotion or two being triggered.

Trapped emotions do more than just trigger angry outbursts though. They can also cause disharmony and imbalance in the physical body. They are also called “blockages” and can be a cause of illness, chronic conditions and inability to fall pregnant.
I have worked with countless women in the clinic who have been trying to fall pregnant for months or years, only to have one or two sessions with me and then “suddenly” they fall pregnant. A clear energy body leads to a harmonious physical body – don’t you think? 

In a world where women are surrounded with images and stories of how precious and joyful the nine or so months of pregnancy can be, it can impose guilt and strong negative feelings when a woman finds that she indeed does not like her pregnant state and longs for it to be over.

If you are somewhere along the fertility journey and are feeling like it is all weighing you down, and that there is hardly any joy in your life, then get in touch and we can have a chat about what you need. 
I can clear the emotions holding you back, weighing you down and stopping you from achieving your desires of the heart. 

Belle xxx

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Safe Skin Care for Pregnancy & Breastfeeding

After a conversation with a pregnant mama the other day, I got to wondering how many other soon-to-be-mamas out there are wondering about skin care and the questionable ingredients contained in these little (expensive) bottles of goodness (or crap)???
I have had a romance with skin care since I completed my Beauty Consultancy diploma after dropping out of uni (double degree in Psych and Sociology – OMG my parents were not happy!) and then began working on counters in David Jones and Grace Bros for Clarins, Yves Saint Laurent, Calvin Klein and Face NY. (Yes, I did drop out of uni for this!) I had always been modelled exceptional skin care habits from my mum, and so I was easily able to share my personal and learned knowledge with women who hadn’t been fortunate enough to know the cleanse-tone-moisturise routine from an early age. (My mum has THE MOST BEAUTIFUL skin at the age of 70. I tell you, it is NEVER too late to start looking after your skin in an intentional and intelligent way.)
I thought I would share my thoughts here on this forum just in case you were wondering what on earth is safe and what you should avoid at all costs during these precious months of incubating and feeding.

Basically there are some standard ingredients that are worthy of avoidance during your pregnancy  – the reason being, there are no tests or research performed, as no pregnant woman in her right mind would offer herself as a guinea pig. 

Ingredients to Avoid:

Retinoids in all forms (Seen listed as Retinol, Retin-A, Retinoic Acid in products)

Vitamin A: Retinoids are derived from Vitamin A – so many suggest avoiding it too. Unless they come from natural sources.

BHA or Beta Hydroxy Acid

Salicylic Acid

Lactic Acid + Glycolic Acid

Dihydroxyacetone: This is the ingredient used in self tanners and again, some sources say to avoid others say its ok. But honestly, I think you can handle being “white” for 9mths, rather than risk your bub being fed these ingredients? Right?

You also need to avoid using skin care that is reactive – usually containing essential oils or other reactive ingredients. When you are pregnant you may suddenly develop the most stunning, glowing skin (not often actually) or you may experience breakouts like a teenager and hate looking in the mirror for 9mths. Hormones. Plain and simple. And stress. And worry. And binge eating on chocolate or ice cream or Maccas will do it too. Oh and deciding to buy/sell/renovate a house will do it to you as well. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

 

The Best Skin Care Products to use:

Products that are designed to work in synergy – no it isn’t a marketing ploy, it is ALWAYS best to use ONE BRAND of skin care and not chop and change. The reason? They are designed to work together to create glorious magick on and in the skin. If you can avoid it, don’t buy different products from different ranges. Choose one. Love it and stick to it.

Choose products that are deeply soothing – pregnancy can cause sensitivity all of a sudden. And if it does, it will usually last up to around 2yrs postnatal – at which time you may be having an other baby, so choose a brand that is solid, and reliable and has a proven track record.
If you happen to get angry breakouts then you may need to speak to a beauty therapist who is trained in helping skin to calm down.
Remember you still need to exfoliate, but maybe not as often, or as firmly. Exfoliation is IMPERATIVE for keeping the skin hydrated and balanced. If you have a build up of gunk and dead skin, then your moisturiser won’t sink in as easily and your make up won’t sit perfectly flat. So be sure to get a facial once per month and use a home exfoliator at least once per week. You will use less serum and moisturiser if you do this. 
Speaking of serums…..they are reaaaallllyyy important. These beauties are the healer of the skin. So you will use them most often at night, and they will go to work while you sleep (or toss and turn, or get up to go to the toilet umpteen times).

Moisturisers are necessary. As are cleansers. Don’t fool yourself into thinking you can get away with using soap and water well into your 30’s…as your “skin routine”. It won’t work, and you will be avoiding photos or mirrors from age 35 onwards if you persist in this.

Cleansers will remove make up and pollution that sits on the skin. Whilst also beginning the hydrating process. Moisturisers s go down in the layers of skin and will help store water – which will plump the skin and reduce lines and wrinkles. Soap is drying and will cause more wrinkles and decrease the quality of the skin. 

If you are really dry, then a soothing masque is a good investment to use weekly. Most people in the area of Sydney I live in are not super dry unless they are a Flight Attendant, or work in air con all the time, or sit on the beach in the sun for hours and hours each week. IF this is you, then make sure you choose your monthly self-care ritual to include a hydrating masque as part of the treatment. Otherwise, just have a monthly or quarterly facial and this will be all you need as an added hydra boost.

 

Why I choose Hydraflore:

I choose Hydraflore for my clinic and for my personal use. Nope, I’m never having a baby again (i think 3 + 2 is enough) but I can still use and enjoy this gorgeous, soothing and hydrating line of skin care. In fact my hubby and I have been using it for years because it works. And it is gentle, and doesn’t smell too girly.

The ingredients are Eco Certified and Organic – according to European standards. Which means that all ingredients must be natural origin and at least 95% must be certified organic. Very different standards to here in Australia. 
There are no silicones, or fillers that will clog the skin, or seep into deeper layers and then have to be dealt with by the liver as a toxin.

Hydraflore was created specifically for pregnant or reactive/sensitive skins, so you can be sure this range will be super gentle – yet effective for you.

Beauty Oil is the stand out product in this range, and doubles as a massage oil, facial serum and stretch mark fighter. Why wouldn’t you use this product?
I personally used this oil after I had an “age spot” removed from my forehead (I cannot believe I had an age spot at age 36yrs!) I used a dab of this oil 4 times per day, along with Hydraflore Firming serum and there is NO scarring and you cannot even see where it used to be.

Hydraflore is the real deal. Don’t be fooled by marketing, and don’t get wowzed by the scammers that are putting “organic” on their products without having the proper certifications (there are ways around this, didn’t you know?) 

For one time in your entire life, pregnancy and breastfeeding is the time you are really careful about the food and water you drink, about your exercise, about your hair dye and definitely you should be careful about your skin care too. Your skin is your biggest organ, it absorbs and filters, and so you need to make damn sure the stuff you put on it won’t make your liver work harder than it has too, or that it won’t allow toxins into the umbilical cord.

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Enter: The Wise Woman

Are you ready to meet your Wise Woman?

You’ve known her all her life. She was there when you were gently brushing your hair in front of the mirror. She was there when you were playing with dolls and lovingly caring for them, whilst your mum commented on what a good “little mother” you were.

She was there when you knew to step away from your boy-crush in school and go back to your girlfriends at the disco, (he was giving you attention, but you knew he was a bit of a sleaze bag.) She was there when you planned a whirlwind adventure and dreamed of quitting your job and travelling off into the sunset with a tall, dark and handsome suitor, but realised that giving up your career for Romeo probably wasn’t going to turn out well.

She was there when you held your best friend as she cried in your arms about the love she had lost. And you whispered to her that she would eventually be okay.

She was there when you held your baby in your arms for the first time and knew in your heart that nothing ever would be the same again.

She was there when you dreamily sat on the balcony with a cuppa in one hand and a pen in another, journaling about your plans for the future.

She was there as you embarked on a new course that helped grow you in ways you never thought possible.

She is YOU. She has always been there.

You are the Wise Woman, just ask your friends and family. Ask your kids if you have them. They will all tell you that they think you are awesome. So when you let go of self-doubt, she is the part of you that inherently knows the path forward, knows the best solution in any situation, and is gentle, and caring and…well, wise.

As she begins to take centre stage in your life you will come to feel her and listen to her. But first it takes an awareness and a trust.

 

I have created the Wise Woman Essentials 6 week online program to help guide you back to the core of who you are. If you would like more information about this program please get in touch. 

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The lates oil to be released from doTERRA could be a God-send for many people.

In a world exclusive doTERRA has created a unique blend of Copaiba oil which combines 4 species of Copaifera*. 

So why has the Oily World gone crazy over it?

 

Copaiba is a powerful oil that affects the same receptor sites in the body as marijuana  – without the “high” or the trouble with the police!

This oil does not contain THC, and yet it packs a powerful punch that can ease stress associated with being in constant pain (thus reducing the pain response), it can help support the digestive system, reduce inflammation in injured tissues and support immune, respiratory and cardiovascular function. 

The creators of this oil blend are humble, but I am here to tell you that this baby is a game changer for anyone who has suffered with constant pain which puts them on the couch, and out of action for days at a time.


The Science: 

Copaiba works on the Enodcannabinoid system which is made up of CB1 and CB2 receptors. The Central Nervous System and Brain (responsible temperature regulation and appetite, among others things) contain CB1 receptors. 

CB2 receptors are found in the endocrine and immune systems. If a chemical affects the CB1 or CB2 receptors they are known as cannabinoids. Marijuana affects CB1 and affects hunger or gives the user “the munchies”.  A “runner’s high” is a result of exercise affecting a response from the CB1 receptors. 

Now, this isn’t the place for a heated “legal / illegal debate” about the use or medical marijuana to heal and soothe people living with chronic pain, dealing with cancer, or being highly stressed. I have my opinions, and I am sure you have yours too. So let’s shelve all that for now….

However, what you do need to know is that there are 3 different types of cannabinoid and Copaiba oil is one of them (aka  BCP: BCP, or Beta-CaryoPhyllene). It affects CB2 receptors and offers superior support for many areas of the body and traditionally has been used to support the body’s natural response to injury or irritation and supports healthy digestion.

 

Usage:

Take INTERNALLY daily (you can combine with Frankincense for a booster) to help support over health – instead of  paracetamol you could take this instead.

DIFFUSE in the home to calm the mind and ease physical symptoms.

Applied TOPICALLY to affected areas with coconut oil to soothe tissues that are inflamed or injured. Combine with Cedarwood to give it a little deeper boost.

 

So how do you get your hands on this oil?

 

IF you are already a Wellness Advocate and have a doTERRA account, then you can order through your Back Office from 2 October 2017

If you are YET TO BECOME A MEMBER then simply click here and follow the prompts to set up an account and become a part of my team. You get weekly support, are entitled to free consults each quarter to learn more precisely how to up-level your health and wellness, and you get to jump into an online Oily world where everyone wants to support you and you will never be alone!

BUT WAIT…..THERE IS MORE:

During October if you purchase a Home Essentials Kit & the Life Long Vitality Pack I will gift you with a FREE bottle of Copaiba oil. This is open to everyone! Even if you are already a member on my team.
These two kits will give you superior quality nutrition, helping to support your body from the inside out. The LLV pack is made up of bioavailable nutrients that may be lacking in your diet. (Lifelong Vitality Pack: watch this vid to find out more) The Home Essentials kit contains 10 oils that can transform the toxic chemical profile of your home (meaning NO MORE cleaning products!), boost immune system, lift mood, support a clear and balanced mind plus much more. 

Used together, you will find that you get sick less, spend less money at the doctor or chemist, and have a Natural First Aid Kit right there in your kitchen that is safe for the whole family.

Home Essential Collection : I will send you my free ebook “100 Uses of Essential Oils” when you order this kit.

 

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The Wild Woman

 

I feel the call of the wild woman. She is whispering to me through the breeze as I write this laying out on the grass on a warm spring day. She is calling me back to an ancient time where women were revered and honoured as divine incarnations and wondrous, life giving creatures.  A time that was focused on respect for wild woman as the community thrived because the wild woman thrived. This is the call whispering to me on the breeze, gently leading me back to the alignment of me with my source energy.
I love the writing and work of Clarissa Pinkola Estes “Women who run with the wolves” and as I think about her teaching of who the wild woman is, I can see how she is showing up in all aspects of my life in this season of growth and change that I am in, but in truth, she has been there all along.

How do you recognise your wild woman?

She establishes territory

She finds her pack

She is in her body with pride

She is aware and alert

She is intuitive

She embraces her cycles

She rises with dignity

She retains as much consciousness as possible

(Clarissa Pinkola Estes – Women Who Run With The Wolves)

 

Long ago as we woman we lost our voice, our power and our spirit; as a result, our belly has started to lose its fire. Woman has snuffed the passion due to fear of rejection, fear of ridicule and fear of hostility against her.

Wild woman calls me to trust that it is safe to return to the source of my vibrancy again. When I was a child I was chastised for being loud, too playful, too showy, too sexy to the men looking on. I had no idea, but I started to think something was wrong with me for the way I looked and made others feel.

 I was encouraged to sit with my legs crossed, or at least with knees together. I was admonished by my own kind – a female teacher – at the tender and impressionable age of 10, for wearing make up to school. My eyes were rimmed with black as coal lashes and my eyebrows were just as dark. My eye lids were blushed with shades of pink and brown. The palette my eyes had been painted with was not of a make-up kit but created by God and I was somehow made to feel self-conscious and “bad” as I tried really hard to wash it off at the request of the teacher. When the teacher threatened to send me to the principal I cried out “but there is nothing on my face. It is just my eyes.” The teacher let it rest, but she didn’t apologise or step back from her anger. I knew in that moment that something wasn’t quite right with me, and that I needed to not stand out. And I was determined to find out what it was that made me stand out. I was also resolute in deciding that I would be perfect from then on, so that I couldn’t get in trouble. Perfectionism became my way of controlling my world.

I realised that my natural beauty and bright energy that shone forth was scary to other women, especially to those who had long since turned their back on their own wild woman essence. It made them uncomfortable and competitive. Subconsciously it also made them ashamed.

I felt from the inside the pull of my wild woman from a very early age. I loved to admire myself in the mirror and was often touching myself because it felt pleasurable. I would take pride in my appearance and I would be proud of the reflection I saw. I was told “nice girls don’t do that” or “stop showing off”, so I was confused as a child – I could feel the inner energy of pride, self-love and self-acceptance pulling at me. But was I supposed to ignore it? Was it some evil force trying to deceive me? Was I naughty? Or, was I simply under the authority of a woman who had ignored her own wild woman when she came calling for her?

I’ve felt the energy of judgement slam against me from many females during my lifetime. From primary school to high school, to the early years navigating the young adult world of bars and clubs. I reached for and sought out romantic liaisons while at the same time learning how far to step into new social groups before I attracted the viciousness of the female members.
This reminded me of a pack of wolves (or dogs) that were fiercely protecting their own males and after reading Estes’ work, I realise that my wild woman was making the other woman compete and want to fight.

I’ve received hostile glares and rejection because I am a stranger, a beautiful one at that, a wild woman who embraces her sexual fire and isn’t afraid to be consumed by it. But I had to choose between female friends or romantic interludes. One couldn’t possibly have both in groups (or packs) where the other woman who were not yet on fire.

My wild woman taught me early on that I never need compete for a man’s attention (she shudders in horror at The Bachelor), instead I trusted in the divine law of attraction. Knowing that if a man wasn’t into me – and only me – then he wasn’t for me at all. I made young men angry in my early life, as I was ignorant of the power I held, as they mistook my affection and kindness for sexual interest. I was called names like “tease” and “slut” when their gestures were still received by me with legs firmly closed. This made me even more confused and yet more eager to please and be perfect – which in turn made them angrier, as I was then “the full package” – but still my legs wouldn’t open for them. What was I doing wrong? I wondered.

If I can’t be accepted by the women for fear of competition or rejection, and I can’t be accepted by the men for fear of them hating me for their unrequited love….then to whom did I actually belong and where did I fit in?

As so I began to be a lone wolf and run without a pack. A woman without her tribe who drifted in and out of groups and relationships knowing her heart fully belonged to one man – of whom she’d never met, but had felt him calling her to him since she was a little girl.

Consequently, as I grew older and my fire was all but snuffed out, the more ignorant of their own wild woman my “friends” became. Telling me to stay in relationships (like they were doing), living day in day out in relationships that poisoned their spirit and dulled the senses. Their reasoning “you have made a choice” “you are married” and words to that effect. Slowly my internal fire was gone and I was still alive but mostly dead in spirit. My physical body became sicker more often and the lustre in my hair and sparkle in my eyes faded. My wild woman called me and at times my ears pricked up, my skin bristled and my lustful (creative) energy returned and I felt more like “me” (a woman I didn’t know but firmly knew was there somewhere). But it was only for short glorious moments, and then my fire burned out again and I further shrunk into that pathetic small version of myself that I had once scoffed at when I recognised it in other women.

The call of the wild woman is an ancient phenomenon; however it was my modern computer – more specifically – my laptop – that is responsible for helping me to find my pack and re-enter the world of the living. I had never owned a laptop before, and so I was only ever at my computer when I was working. Having young children meant I couldn’t spend hours in my office scrolling the interweb, so I could only ever search for information in short, distracted bursts. Buying a laptop opened a world that I had no previous access to, and from the comfort of my lounge and near my cubs, I was able to step into another world of spiritual growth and community and connection by one google search. I lustily read every page I could let my eyes land on, from magick to mythology to energy healing. My mind was thirsty for information and I drank it in, night after night after night. My husband at the time mocked me asking “why do you want to read that for?” and I would dumb down my responses and not let on that I was doing my soul’s work and I was changing. My mind and spirit were being nourished and I was blossoming again into the woman of inspiration and power that I had once been before.

Forums and community groups were my favourite and I loved the interaction on Facebook with people I had once known and then lost contact with. I was chained to my kids, the house and work through the day light hours but at night when the kids were in bed and my husband was otherwise occupied watching banal tv shows, I would hunt for information of the mystical world of quantum physics and the effect of speaking words of love over water molecules!

 

I howled to the moon each night as I lay in bed next to a perfect stranger, a man who had thought he had tamed me, but had no idea that each day I was waiting to pounce on my prey, growing stronger and braver and more resolute. I took more chances creatively and allowed myself to dream again – for my future and for my children’s future. I practices being intentional in meditation and exercise and food choices and I watched as my physical and emotional body began to be equally as strong as my spiritual body.

 

No longer a lone wolf, I had become a part of a pack of women who were independent, yet dependent on each other for nurturing, care and protection. The unknowing leader of my pack was singer/entertainer Pink, the fiercest of the 

wild women in our modern world. A woman who epitomises what it means to be a wild woman, who blazes the trail proudly and loudly and her energy ignites the spirit of others when their time has come to allow their essence to transition with the call. With her music as my personal sound track I left an unhappy marriage and took my cubs into a new home that valued expression; playfulness and creativity; which essentially breathed life and self-confidence into all of us again.

The wild woman doesn’t cry over spilled milk nor does she admonish her children for accidents. The wild woman soothes her child who is scared she has made a mess, and begins to make milk pictures with her fingers in the milk on the floor. The wild woman fully embraces her children who want to act like a cat, insisting on drinking milk from a bowl on the floor. The wild woman teaches her cubs to be comfortable in her own choices and encourages her to wear dress up clothes to bed or skip the bath and wear day clothes to bed “just this once”.
The older women watching on, who have ignored their wild woman, are horrified by non-conformity to rules. But this wild woman knows her duty to her own female children to keep fanning the fire that already burns brightly inside of them.

For a period I began dating again only to realise with every dinner or lunch or coffee the man I longed for and already knew in my heart, was yet to appear. My wild woman was ready to find her mate. But each time my heart was crushed or I laughed a heaty belly laugh at the ludicrousness of the dates I went on, I realised that something had to change. (I think this is where my Wise Woman began to appear – but she is a story for another time).  I made a deal with God “you choose Him and bring Him to me – because I am crap at this”. And I cried and cried and cried as I surrendered my heart to the One who created me. I had to learn to live without wanting to force anything, but to trust that my beloved would show up in perfect timing. I wrote a letter to my beloved and I used rich romantic tones, I wrote words I had never uttered to another man in my life. Somehow it felt strange yet familiar, almost like I had spoken them to him in another lifetime. I folded the letter, held it to my heart and breathed in what I felt like it would feel to embrace him. This man I attracted to me could not be just any man. He must be emotionally strong, yet vulnerable. He must be incredibly masculine, but in tune with his softer side. He must be romantic and an expert lover, yet teachable and house trainable, and he must have an unwavering desire for me. That is all.

Then I placed the letter in my bedside table – what would be his bedside table- when we finally met.
He appeared in my life six months later, as handsome and chivalrous and lusty as I had imagined he would be. I had dared to dream to find a man who would ignite a spark in me that only my man could ignite, and a man who would be the guard and protector and example to my children as well.

And so that brings me to present age, where I feel the wild woman sitting peacefully in the back ground of my true essence now. She ebbs and flows as needed, guiding me, helping me to create, to lead, to explore and to be adventurous. She teaches me that life is worth fighting for and protecting. And mostly she paves the way for the Wise Woman who always follows the awakening.

With my Wild man by my side we have created a rich and exciting life that breathes on its own and fans its own flame. I have chosen wisely the partner who will run freely with me through highs and valleys, always running at the same pace, and always returning to our essence when life throws us off course.

 

 

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6 benefits of massage you may not know

1) Massage is the Anti-Dote to sitting

 

Most people in this modern world exist in a desk-bound, car-bound life-style. The pressure this puts on our spinal column causes all kinds of tension and pain in the neck and shoulders. 

However if you are sitting in a desk most of your waking life (9-5pm full time office workers beware) then more serious forms of stress will start to manifest in the lower back area too.

Research has shown, however that regular fortnightly massage can help re-balance your back muscles and keep you in your job and off compo! So just be sure to schedule your massage as this is an integral part of a healthy work/life balance.

2) Massage eases back pain

The Touch Research Institute (TRI) in Miami, FL has shown that regular massage increases blood flow to the muscles and alleviates the sensation of pain felt by patients. So if you stand up after a long period of sitting, and reach to your lower back and feel stiff and sore, then a “prescription” of fortnightly remedial massage is just what the doctor should be ordering you (NOT anti inflammatory drugs and endone). 

Massage increases blood flow to muscles and helps to break up fibrous tissues (which cause pain). Increase blood flow improves flexibility in the muscles and reduces the chance of muscle spasm (felt when you “put your back out” reaching for a shoe on the floor) and muscle tearing (this isn’t good, and this alone should be your reason for booking preventative massage!)

3) Massage eases anxiety and depression and stress

The benefits of soothing, supportive nurturing touch are the basis for any good relationship – including with your massage therapist. With the right therapist, you can receive “body counselling” as well as physical stretching, and massage. Regular visits with your massage therapist creates more than just a good feeling in your muscular body – it creates good feeling in your brain as well.
Positive touch  – especially for people who are not in close intimate relationships – can boost mood and improve overall feelings of happiness.  
 And for pregnant women, the news is even better: the TRI has found that just 20mins massage each week over 12 weeks significantly reduced the rate of depression in their pregnant patients, and also reduced the amount of stress hormone – cortisol – that was in the mum (and bub’s) body! DOUBLE win!

Depression is a major ailment affecting around 1 million Australian adults , and over 2 million have anxiety. Research has shown that teens and adults who receive regular massage have lower stress levels and report feeling much more relaxed and happy. (Journal of the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry). Considering anti-depressants are being handed out like lollies, and have a heap of side effects, surely a visit to the massage clinic fortnightly would be a better way to manage depression?

When you combine massage therapy and energy healing and counselling your experience becomes much more than just a “feel good” appointment. Belle offers deep healing and transformation appointments, because she combines the best of three worlds: talking therapy and energy healing and massage therapy. Her appointments are in hot demand, because her clients walk in stressed, angry and frustrated with pain in their neck and shoulders and back, and walk out lighter, calmer and pain free. This is because when the emotional body is stressed it gives you physical symptoms. Remove the emotional stress and the physical pain ease.

 

4) Massage improves sleep habits

Massage helps to sedate and soothe the nervous system. Most adults aren’t getting enough restful, deep sleep every night. We call it Sleep Hygiene, and to be honest the majority of the population are filthy according to sleep standards!

You’ve heard of the “fight or flight” response of your nervous system? And no doubt you have felt that second wind you get around 11pm at night….that moment during GoT where your eyes are getting heavy and you know you should turn the TV off, but it is so engrossing, and you really must keep watching to see if Tyrion is going to be killed, and then the plot changes suddenly and WHAM! you are wide awake again. You nudge your partner and say “want to watch another ep?” 
Suddenly you are so awake you feel amazing and you grab some chips from the kitchen and a cuppa and then you can’t get to sleep until 1am when your eyes finally start to droop (and have watched another 3 eps). 
Don’t tell me you don’t know what I’m talking about! 

This is a huge disruption in your circadian rhythms and if you miss your sleep cues you are screwed for another few hours. 
Massage will help your nervous system to re-boot and relax, meaning it will help you to settle yourself easier later in the night -it doesn’t matter what time of day you have a massage – but only YOU can make a choice to get up and turn the telly off at 9.45pm and start getting ready for bed. 

Game of Thrones aside, massage improves sleep for both the young and old alike! This is music to every new mum and dad’s ears! Baby massage has long been used to help new parents bond with their newborn, but the possibility of helping their child sleep like…ahem…”a baby” is even more of a reason for learning baby massage. Don’t you think?

Soothing massage with pure lavender or chamomile oil can help ease tummy pains, and has been shown to improve digestion and sleep/wake cycles. So it is worth starting off early with your kids and spending some time each day giving them a quick tummy or foot massage. 

Massage also encourages a restful sleep for those who can’t otherwise comfortably rest. Oncology massage is a perfect way to help clients who are undergoing treatment, or just finished treatment. The technique is softer and more gentle and the emphasis is on pure comfort (both Tamara and Ange are fully qualified Oncology Massage Therapists).

5) Massage boosts immunity

In this, our worst Flu season in YEARS, this is music to your ears right? The prevention for flu is a regular massage? Possibly. Cedars Sinai conducted research that showed Swedish or “light touch” massage improves the immune system function after just 45mins massage.

This is exciting news, because it proves what we already know – there is a time and place for deep tissue massage – but NOT when you are feeling under the weather. In our clinic our policy is: If you are feverish, sneezing or coughing, you cannot come for massage (you will pass on germs), but if you are Post-Viral, or just feel like something is coming on, then a Relaxation massage is definitely what the doctor ordered! 

6) Massage eases PMS

SHOUT IT OUT LADIES – this is your MASSIVE EXCUSE to tell your partner you need to dedicate some of the household budget to fortnightly massage therapy! I bet you that he will agree to anything you want, if he knows massage will help put the T-Rex in it’s box!

Joking aside, massage therapy twice per month decreases anxiety, depressed mood and pain associated with cramping and the longer term effects of massage therapy included a reduction in pain and water retention and overall menstrual distress. (Hernandez-Reif, M, Martinez , A., Field, T., Quintino, O., Hart, S., & Burman, I. (2000). Premenstrual syndrome symptoms are relieved by massage therapy. Journal of Psychosomatic Obstetrics & Gynecology, 21, 9-15.)

 

 

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Emotions are your guide post

Not all physical sensations are from a physical place. They are quite often from the emotional body. Let me give you an example:


 You know that sinking feeling you might get when you think of someone who might be in trouble? 
Or that feeling of butterflies right before you have to do public speaking?

What about the sensation of tightness in your chest and you feel like you are going to have a panic attack?

Have you ever had a friend that made me so frustrated you could feel all tight across the chest and hot flushes going up the neck and face?

Do you ever experience times in social situations when you feel totally drained?

I have learned how to work with my “felt sense” – that part of me that feels everything. If you can learn to understand the “language” of your body, talking to you and relaying your emotional body, then you can learn how to let it guide you. 

So what can you do to start becoming aware of your emotional guidance system?

    1. Start by making a choice to become more aware of how your day to day emotions feel in the physical body.
      You can practice this by starting on the GOOD FEELING emotions. So, when you are happy, stop for a moment and ask yourself “where am I feeling happy in my body the most?”
      Then when you are feeling sad, ask yourself “where am I feeling most sad in my body?”
      This isn’t hard to do, but may take some practice before you feel confident identifying the feeling area. 
    2. Once you can identify the feeling you are feeling and where it sits in the body, you can ask why it is there. Only do this for the negative emotions, or the ones that feel more difficult. This way you can almost “make friends” with them, and they wont seem so heavy or oppressive.

 

With practice, you will start to recognise the feeling of the emotion in your body, long before you recognise it in your brain! Then you can make decisions from this.

Invited out with a friend, and you feel heavy in your belly?
Then simply decline with grace, as your body has said “the timing is not right on this one today”.

Offered a promotion at work but you feel immediately tight in your chest? Possibly this is your usual response of panic setting in (self-sabotage?), and you need to work on your self-confidence?
(Book in an energy clearing session to correct this).

Can you imagine how more genuine and heart-centred, your life will become when you learn how to listen to your emotional feedback system, and live from this centre?

If you approach life from your head too much, you may over-think – and think things that aren’t actually there! But if you go from your “feeling sense” you will never go wrong. You will free yourself of negativity and drama, and allow peace and good feeling to grow!

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Shit Happens….


One morning I was laying on the couch and the sun was barely peeking through the clouds, and I was hating my life and hating the fact that I had to endure another day with two kids at home and one at school, and juggle everyone and try to get thru the day without losing it.
My body was exhausted, and my mind was in a permanent state of cranky.

I was drowning in housework day in day out, trying to get the kids out the door to school/kindy on time (never happened two days in a row), trying to run a fledgling biz on no longer than 3hrs of sleep at a time, feeling like I was walking in mud all day long, dealing with total food intolerance and being on a permanent Elimination Diet ( which meant I ate mostly air, as anything else I ate gave me hives or aching muscles or a headache or IBS.) I really was at a low point in my life, and I was fairly certain that it couldn’t get any worse.

Their father had already left for work (he later informed me that he was so tired that he tended to leave early and then park his car on the side of the road and have a sleep on the way to work …. did I mention I am now divorced from this man?)


On this particular morning I had stopped trying to tell the kids to go back to sleep, or to wait until Mr Sun pops thru the clouds (which I say in a gritted teeth “sing song voice”) – resigned to the fact that my sleep time was over and I knew there was no alternative but to get up. I thought I would be smart and clever and put the t.v on for them to sit quietly and watch for another 3 hours so I could lay on the couch and sleep right near them, whilst they sat transfixed by Teletubbies or Dora the Bloody Explorer. Except at their age, they wouldn’t watch the damned thing, but terrorize the house from the moment they woke up until the time they were ordered into their room after 7pm.

My eyes just wouldn’t stay open and I was somewhere in that zone between sleep and awake and could hear everything my kids were doing far far off in the distance. I could hear rustling of cereal boxes in the kitchen (good, Yes I know they are in the next room and not wandering out the front door). I can hear talking in muffled voices and giggling ( good, yes they are planning a terrorist attack on me for later in the morning, but for now I will listen to their “naughty laugh” and prepare myself accordingly) and I did think for a moment “I should get up and investigate and get them some food”, but my body just wouldn’t move.
Besides I knew EXACTLY what they were up to, for I am super mum and my ears are awake and my brain is functioning, even though this dream I am having feels awfully real too.
Another thirty minutes on the couch couldn’t hurt. Right?

I had completely nodded off and was woken by my darling one year old girl patting my face and sticking her fingers into my nose and mouth. This went on for a while. I was able to zone out and steal those last few minutes of rest/sleep before I had to sit up and let the day officially begin. However I could smell the sweetness of the cereal on her fingers and my mind started becoming more alert and I was thinking “what cereal has she got into?” I prided myself on only giving my youngest oats for breakky, and I was feeling a little disappointed that she had tried her first commercial cereal while I was sleeping, and this made me an inferior mother, and I had probably let her down, and ruined her future success (I did mention I was incredibly tired and my brain didn’t think logically or straight in this time of my life).

Try as I might, I just couldn’t remember which cereal it could be. Mainly because the ones I usually bought weren’t that sweet. But then I remembered that I had put the cereal up high on the shelf the night before, because I was trying to limit what the older kids were getting into each day when I was laying on the couch, catching those last minutes of sleep. (I did this a lot!)

And then I sniffed a little, and her fingers pushed into my mouth and then I opened one eye and saw my baby girl was putting one hand into her nappy and then pulling it out again saying “yuck yuck yuck” and then poking me in the face with the same finger!

Suddenly I was wide awake and I realised that she hadn’t been eating cereal at all, (and yes my idea to hide the cereal had worked! She hadn’t gotten into it  – result!) and that her fingers had been in her nappy and then up my nose and in my mouth.

Eyes open wide awake! Run to the sink and wash my face and mouth out. Gagging. Blowing my nose. Yes I am bloody awake now! Washing some more. Making guttural sounds that started to scare the children. Washing hands. Blowing nose. Gagging again.

So when I mentioned earlier, I was at a low point and life couldn’t get much worse….well I guess I was wrong. The moral of this story?

Shit happens. And then you wash yourself off, and get on with it. And live to tell the story five years later to your new husband and his children, and have them in fits of laughter and gross-out, and realise that you are stronger than what you think you are in the moment. And that all things happen for a reason (still waiting for that reason) and that you can literally eat a shit sandwich and still go on to have a great life.

Never give up. This “young children” season you are in, will only last a few years.